Sunday, December 25, 2016
Once Upon a Time
He was an old, chubby man with pale skin and a snowy beard. Dressed in a ruby-red dinner jacket, he reminded me of a cherry about to pop. We met at a banquet hall on the east end of Ever After. It was a fairy tale wedding and I was sitting at a neatly plated table.
He approached me from behind and began poking at my shoulder with a saintly finger. I turned to observe his robust form as he insisted that I was in his seat. I assured him that I was properly placed and that I would not be moving. In a huff, he stormed out of the room.
Returning, he brought a worldly man, dressed in a striped shirt and cap. The gentleman asked to see my name tag, which I gladly shared. After giving it a quick glance, he bent down and whispered something into the chap’s ear.
I could see the old boy’s anger rise as he realized the irony of the situation. He began to wheeze audibly. Now amused, I told him that I would move if he provided me with a nominal fee. I smirked with vengeance, knowing that I had cornered him at last.
He began fumbling over his words, like Porky Pig struggling to express a deep-seated rage. I bathed in the moment, letting it mend the many times I awoke to an empty tree. Finally, after a lot of hoeing and hawing, he paid the toll.
Before I left, I wanted to thank the tall gentleman for playing along, but I couldn’t find him. No matter, my story had a sweet ending. I mused about the evening as I sauntered back to my bridge. Santa flies his sleigh and trolls don’t make the nice list. I guess this is why.